Chapter 9 The Journal Entry 1

Entry One: The First Three Days

The silence is aching with a need for noise and the occasional drip echoing softly from the speleothems lining the ceiling within Kimmuriel's chambers are the only sounds I have heard. I miss the calls bellowing forth from the singing throats of the song birds above ground, however short my stay there had been. I am desperate to get back to the surface to hear those melodies again.

I have been in Kimmuriel's care and training for a count of three days now, though he has made no effort to even acknowledge my existence, or so it feels. I know he has been observing me from his dark corners, studying me carefully. I know he has been delving into my mind in secret, picking apart whatever he can find there. He is measuring me up, he is figuring out how to work me into his routine and train me according to his wants and desires.

Jarlaxle must have known how lonely I would become down here. He gave me the leather bound journal I write in now. Writing helps tame the boredom I find so suffocating right now. Before I left with Kimmuriel, Jarlaxle sat down with me to give me advice that, as he put it, "would keep me alive."

Jarlaxle told me that it takes a special person to really know Kimmuriel and Kimmuriel is the one who gets to decide who is special. I have come to understand just how guarded and reserved the drow psion is. Kimmuriel doesn't allow anyone close to him, he keeps a safe distance from most and he decides who he chooses as 'friendly' acquaintances. Jarlaxle warned me to never touch Kimmuriel, Kimmuriel does not allow anyone to lay a hand on him and those who do, don't live long to tell about it.

Kimmuriel is the single most dangerous weapon Jarlaxle has at his disposal. He is calculating and cruel and I know he is thinking about all the ways he would enjoy hurting me. Nothing would bring him more pleasure than my demise. I am a threat to him, not only is my ability working against me but my gender is as well. Kimmuriel, the misogynist that he is, has an utmost distrust of women and what he doesn't know, is that I know why. I could feel it in him. I know he hides a similar past to mine and I know he suffered through a cruel abuse that is responsible for forming the very creature he has come to be…


I must stop writing now, he is here…